Do people with more than one child honestly deserve to be congratulated on their subsequent pregnancy news?

I mean obviously they are seeking attention and fishing to be congratulated the moment they share their pregnancy news – but what makes them deserving of being wished especially after they have already produced an offspring?

Let’s face it – the first time is often a surprise. A pregnancy announcement can be a sign that both partners in a relationship have healthy reproductive systems – great, congratulations on that. You both knew what you wanted, and how to achieve it and you did – so good job on you both.

At the end of the day, we all know what causes pregnancy. It isn’t a surprise. Even if it is an unexpected or unplanned pregnancy – it isn’t hard to extend the obligatory “congratulations” when met with a pregnancy announcement… I mean as long as it’s the first of its kind.

Yay, you wanted to be child-free, but got caught off guard unexpectedly because things didn’t go to plan and you ended up catching feels, which lead to continuing on with the pregnancy… congratulations (especially because I am genuinely surprised).

Same sex couple? Single mother that found the perfect donor? Successful surrogacy? IVF procedure that worked? Congratulations!

Here’s where it gets a little too much though – how many times do you expect to be congratulated?

Unless there are truly extenuating circumstances – for example, if you were producing children by multiple partners – where it’s an ‘unknown’ whether you and your new person would be successful in reproducing – do you honestly deserve to have any subsequent pregnancy offered any sort of ‘congratulations’?

I don’t believe you do!

You’re following the same formula you did the first time – and you’re getting the same results. Big deal!

Let’s face it – if it were baby number four onwards people wouldn’t congratulate the expectant parents – so why do we waste our breath on anything after the first?!

It’s ridiculous!

Can you imagine that? Can you picture how awful it sounds not to congratulate someone simply because they already have a child?

This is EXACTLY what people do once they feel a family has ‘too many kids’. The element of surprise is completely lost and because a subsequent pregnancy is almost EXPECTED – no one feels the joy of congratulating those expectant parents – because somehow that pregnancy does not deserve it.

It’s actually really sad, but true.

Once you’ve reached the limit of children society has placed on mankind, the word “congratulations” is suddenly replaced by the most snidest remarks and cruel jokes. 

Basic human decency is replaced with ridicule.  And large families tolerate the bad behaviour. Unfortunately some may choose not to disclose their marvellous pregnancy news due to horrendous past experiences with others – but at the end of the day do they really need to hear your ‘congratulations’ – your ‘approval’?

Does anyone need to hear fake words of support? And if you aren’t going to be caring for that baby in any way – does your opinion even matter?!

The truth is, it doesn’t. You don’t actually matter in the life of that family – of that baby. You are just as meaningless as your empty words, or lack there of. So “congratulations” or not – you don’t actually matter. And although every new life truly does deserve to be celebrated and congratulated, at the end of the day that beautiful soul will thrive, with or without your well wishes.